In a recent coaching session, my client asked me to send instructions on how to craft his “statements of self-truth.”
He was telling me about using affirmations and trying to think positive. We had a discussion about how those words and actions are mostly meaningless because they don’t connect with truth.
When you affirm, “I am rich, and powerful, and loveable” — an all-too-common affirmation — what reality does that connect with if you are currently not rich, or powerful, or loveable?
If you don’t feel self-love, your brain won’t believe that affirmation. If you’re $50K in debt, the reactive…
The quotation in the subject line of today’s email was often said by Madeline Davis. As a Canadian, I didn’t know much about who she was until I read a more in-depth article about her by my colleague, Jeffry J. Iovannone about her influence on the Queer History of Buffalo.
One thing stood out to me in Jeff’s article that prompted me to invite him on the Think Queerly Podcast for a discussion. He wrote,
“I didn’t have much exposure to LGBTQ history or culture within my formal education. I now see this as an aspect of the oppression LGBTQ…
Do you remember the P.S. I wrote in last week’s newsletter?
“Look for a special email from me early next week. I’m creating a free live webinar training about how to handle negative and destructive emotions.”
The good news is that I will still be delivering the webinar. The training itself is done. The bad news is that there are a few techincal decisions I need to finalize that have put the brakes on things. However, it’s worth taking the time to figure out the best solution for my busienss, so I can offer you more webinars in the future.
“If one tries to control people with punishments, cleverness and treachery will surely arise; if one tries to define with names how people should behave, order and consideration will surely be lost; if one tries to encourage people through the use of praise, contention over who should be exalted will surely arise; if one tries to manage people with self-denial, contradictory behavior will surely ensue; and if one tries to act by using eclectic elements, weedy disorder will surely develop.” — Wang Bi
This is a clever commentary from Wang Bi, written around 250 CE, and who is one…
For some time, I was holding back a post, wondering if I should wade into the debate about words and violence. I’m sure you’ve read about events in the news in which someone was accused of inflicting violence upon another person with their words. We need to talk about this issue.
From my perspective, I am not convinced that words — in and of themselves — can be violent. That statement comes from my understanding that violence is physical or forceful in the sense of having a physical manifestation. That could be understood in the following ways:
One of my passions is to inspire LGBTQ+ people to connect with their creative genius and use their unique potential to make an equitable difference in the world.
That passion sparks a flame that burns bright within me, but what’s the opposite of that bright light? The darkness of course, but in the context of doing inspired work, the opposite is boredom, frustration, and procrastination — the death of joy, creativity, and productivity.
Boredom results in procrastination, which is doing something meaningless to avoid taking action and facing your fears about why you are bored in the first place…
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.
The idea that insults, prejudicial or racist language is a form of violence is a highly problematic one that needs to be addressed.
If we change the definition of violence so that the simple use of words could be used to ruin the life of another person, we create a slippery slope with no end towards a permanently polarized world built entirely upon an us vs. them mortal dichotomy.
We need to maintain a clear distinction between violence and its meaning as a physical manifestation of…
A wise person once said:
“You have within you the knowledge and wisdom to overcome personal struggles and inequality. Love and accept yourself without conditions, and you will be loved and appreciated by others.”
No, that wasn’t written by some self-help guru. I wrote those words in early February 2020, part of an exercise to draft my purpose statement from a 30-day intensive transformation program run by my coach.
The next day, I wrote an email to my coach:
I feel very underwhelmed by my purpose statement, but I don’t see this as a failure. …