Say the Fuck What You Need to Say
Last year I had a funny conversation with a friend who lives in the USA. She asked if it was just me, or a Canadian thing, to swear so much in my writing.
Say what you want, but mean what you need to say.
When I chose to say or write, “fuck,” I do so because it’s a multifaceted, powerful word. I use it to express greater exclamation, but I don’t believe I over use it, or just for the sake of swearing.
Some people don’t like the word, or they find it offensive. I don’t think “fuck” (or any word) is a word that should be controlled and policed.
Apparently there are over 7,000 spoken languages in the world. There must be hundreds of millions of words in all those languages combined. We have a rich vocabulary for a reason: to express our thoughts and feelings.
If someone says I shouldn’t use a particular word, fuck them!
Of course, you could start a dialogue first. Ask a question, i.e. “What about that word bothers you?” and see where that goes! :-)
In finding my voice, in trusting myself, I need to be free. When I hold myself back from saying or writing, “fuck”, not talking about gay sex, my fears, my vices, or being vulnerable, I stay confined and boxed up.
The raw and the gritty is not only where good stories come from, but it’s how I am most authentic.
When I say, “fuck”, I’m not controlling your thoughts or restricting your actions. I’m expressing my thoughts and feelings. How you respond to a word is on you.
To some degree we are all constrained. You might have been brought up never to swear or (sacrilege!) take the lord’s name in vain. Please. Dogma is yet another box.
What would happen if you said what you mean to say?
What would happen if you erased one line from that three dimensional blackboard drawing of a box to reveal your truth?
How much more could you come out, completely be yourself, ask for help, or take the risk to do what you’ve only been dreaming about?
Yes, the box we build up around ourselves is safe, but so is a coffin.
How Do You “Live OUT the Best of You?”
As proud gay men we deserve more than trying to fit into the status quo. We are different and unique, and we can use our gifts as gay men to make the world a better place. Find out more about my message of Living OUT the Best of You here.