The Bigger Your Problem The More You Need To Try This Solution

Most of us are living in a drama of our own creation.

  • Have you ever had a huge blowout with a friend or a loved one?
  • Have you been faced with what seems like an impossible problem?
  • Have you ever needed to do something that made you crazy-upset or make you get your back up defensively?

As humans we are either in drama or data mode.

When I write, “drama” it’s not to diminish or make light of what you are experiencing. And “data” means looking at things logically, and/or analyzing the facts. In my example of looking for a job, the data would be my finances. The drama involves all my emotions around money, pride, and failure.

How to get into “data” mode

The first thing you need to do is to go for a walk. Stay with me here…

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Photo by Jon Flobrant on Unsplash

Walk for 30 minutes or longer and alone

No music. No distractions. Set your phone to airplane mode.

The Selfie-Video for One’s Self

The Step-By-Step Process

  1. Start by taking a walk outside in nature, free from all distractions. Set your phone to airplane mode.
  2. Walk until you feel you mind is calm. Take as long as you need.
  3. Record a selfie video with your phone while walking. Talk out your problem to yourself. I find it helps if you look into your own eyes while doing this to get to the heart of the matter. Take as long as you need. You’ll know when you’re done.
  4. When you’re done recording, don’t look at the video anywhere from a few hours until tomorrow. (See note below.)
  5. In private and without distraction or interruption (remember, phone in airplane mode and all notifications off), watch your video and take notes.
  6. Repeat the process of watching the video and making notes if needed. It’s amazing what you can pick up on a second pass. You might notice things like your tone of voice, the quickness of your speech, or body language. What do all of these cues tell you?
  7. If you’re still struggling with your problem, repeat the process from the start.
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Photo by Andrei Coman on Unsplash

Why you need to do this process

The biggest problem most people face is that they don’t have enough clarity around why they have the problem in the first place.

  • your past
  • your behaviours
  • your mindset
  • your beliefs
  • your environment
  • your health
  • what you want (but aren’t getting)
  • money
  • and so on.

Was this useful? Would you like some help unpacking your problems?

This process is a great place to start to get some clarity. But many people get stuck with the next steps, i.e. what needs to change, how to affect those changes, and implementing practices and systems to improve their life.

Written by

I help human-hearted creatives cultivate their purpose to experience more freedom, impact, and joy in their lives. DarrenStehle.com.

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